Let Go (Written 10/6/2011)

About 3 weeks ago, I went to urgent care because I had been having chests pain for 5 days.  While there, the nurse administered an EKG.  Moments later, the doctor rushed in and explained that the EKG came back abnormal and ran down all this stuff that could be wrong.  By now, I am crying so hard, I can’t even see the doctor anymore.  The next thing I know, a nurse is running in with nitroglycerin and aspirin.  I hear the doctor shouting to the nurse to get me a cardiologist appointment  “NOW!”  As I am sitting there, all types  of things are running through my head like, “Who will take care of my son if something happens to me, etc.”  The nurse comes in with the info for the cardiologist and the doctor tell me, “Not to worry.  It’s nothing that can’t be fixed.”  “Don’t worry?  Really?
Before I went to the cardiologist, I called my mother hysterical and when I could finally get the words out, I said, “The doctor said….”  My mom shouted, “STOP!  Don’t SAY anything!  There is NOTHING wrong with you.  Keep repeating to yourself, “By his stripes, I am healed.” It’s funny thinking back, how hearing those words calmed d me down immediately. All the way to the doctor, I kept repeating, “By his stripes, I am healed.  By his stripes, I am healed.”  I said it over and over again as I waited in the waiting room and as I took another EKG.  The results were the same.
Over the last couple of weeks, I have taken all kinds tests.  I have had ultrasounds, some machine that looks like a MRI machine take pictures of my heart.  I have been injected with all kinds of stuff and have been stuck with more needles than one should see in their lifetime.  During this time, I have carried on like nothing was wrong.  I did not let the thought of those tests results consume me.  I was still having chest pains and through it all, my mantra became, “By his stripes, I am healed.”  I went to church and had the preacher pray for me.  I put my offering envelope on the altar with “healing in my body” written on the back.  I started walking every morning with gospel music playing on Pandora radio and every time I wanted to give up and not walk, Dwayne Woods’ song,” Let Go” would come on and I mean EVERY time!  “…As soon as I stopped worrying, worrying how the story end… I let go and I let God, let God have his way and that’s when things start happening…”
If you have talked to me during this time, some of you knew what was going on, but I never confessed out of my mouth what the doctor said was wrong with my heart.  I didn’t stay locked in the house crying asking God, “Why me?”  I didn’t skip a beat because I let go and let God.  I didn’t worry.  I didn’t stress.  I KNEW nothing was wrong with me.  I KNEW that the devil was a liar and that God was not going to let me go out like that.
True to his word, today the doctor called me today with the results and there is NOTHING wrong with my heart.  Thank you, Jesus!  The reason why I am sharing this is because I have several friends, many who I know will be reading this, who are going through  some things.  Some may be health issues, some financial issues, relationship issues or they may be tired of their job and want to quit.  You have to let go and let God.  You have been trying to do it on your own.  You have seen doctor after doctor, seen counselors, put in applications…you have done all you can.  Now, you have to let go, let God and BELIEVE that he will do for you what you are asking.  I am not the a “holy holy” person, I don’t go to church every Sunday.  I am not a saint BUT what I have always had was a belief in God and if you have that faith of a mustard seed, and believe in God, everything that you are going through WILL do a 360 degree turn and the victory will be yours.
Be blessed,
Ty
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By thesexysinglemommy Posted in Fath Tagged ,